Lose yourself

Lose yourself, let go of that which stifles you, that which encumbers the body and traps the soul.  Lose yourself that you may see clearly the truth...this world seeks only to suffocate.  Lose yourself that every breath may become easier as each breath is drawn in the love of God.  We spend so much time grappling with worry; deliberating for hours which path to take and still, at the end of the day, our legs paralyzed, unable to move for rationalization of every possible direction has rendered us incapacitated.  Somehow we fear the past, waiting for it to eclipse the present.  Living in the present is riddled by dubious thoughts of the future; cluttered by what if statements, the heart unable to unveil its strength as the mind perpetuates fear.  Lose yourself, get lost, let faith be the spring board by which we dive into the unconditional love which the Father offers.  To lose ourselves in God is to know love every moment of every day; it is to find hope in a seemingly hopeless moment; it is to know peace even when the day brings nothing but turmoil.  Wreckage from the day's battle quickly becomes the skeletons of the past which we fear while the carnage splattered about has us skittish about the future.  Every moment wasted in worry, every moment riddled with doubt, each second encumbered by fear, each second manipulating words and skewing the heart are moments, seconds detached from love, detached from the Father, detached from our home.  Thus we search for this home, like Lewis and Clark, we travel every mountainside, we leave no stone unturned and yet we still find nothing; the home for which we intensely search eludes us.  Tangible our home is not, therefore we will never find it as explorers in search of a new world.  Our home is already present within our being, we need not look high and low, we need not travel for years, it will not be discovered on a mountaintop retreat.  To discover our home we must do one thing, lose ourself.  As simple as these words are, the task is daunting for, stimulated by the mind, logical, rational thought becomes a wrecking ball to the heart and instead of permitting the strength of the heart to accept the blow, we attempt to block even its swing for the fallacies of the mind masterfully created a distrust of the power of the heart.  The constant attempt to protect the heart inevitably cripples the soul and we walk as wounded soldiers in a battle only we, ourselves fight...we the oppressor and yet we the victim.  Every walk become uphill and every breath constricted by the mind so much so that each step a struggle for it is tempered by fear of the moment...what will be, what will come to pass if????  Life quickly becomes a series of calculated moves; manuscripts of conversations are prepared to ensure the perfect response in any given situation; in essence life becomes scripted by the mind to escape the heart.  Lose yourself. That which is tangible creates only fictitious securities for that which is nonexistent; yet, mistakenly, that it is what we seek for we believe it will make us rich.  We know God, we are given the opportunity to intimately partake in a relationship with the Father, all we need to do is lose ourself.   These bags we carry only slow our step; the course we have painstakingly map for ourselves lead only through treacherous terrain; the practiced discourses equate to the jester's folly.  Thus sole reliance on the mind results in heavy baggage which we willfully carry through impassable terrain only to be mocked by onlookers.  Lose yourself, be free of that which hinders the heart, let the heart bear the burdens of this life for its strength is unparalleled.  Today, let us become lost in the arms of God that He may settle our doubts and discard our fears.  Let us pray that we may lose ourselves:

 

Dear God,

Today I attempt to lose myself...

Lose myself, that brings about fear, it brings about angst.  I want so desperately to be prepared yet I am finding that I am missing each moment.  Each moment of your love, each moment of your peace...this is what I need, this is what I shall have if I but lose myself.  Constructed to withstand a blast from a nuclear attack, my fortress secure, or so I thought for I have discovered the enemy already within my gates...I am my own worst enemy as I clutch onto the rationale of this world and toss aside the words of my heart...words which incessantly sing a melody of love, words which invite my imperfections and silence my doubts.  I so readily give into the haunting fallacies of the mind in a effort to protect that which needs no protection, that which seeks to protect me...my heart.  I pretend not to understand the workings of this world, the human mind can conceive incomprehensible notions and worse yet has the power to bring to life such notions.  And so I run, God, a fugitive in search of a home, in search of protection yet I run in the wrong direction.  Today I had over the maps, the manuscripts, the tools used to climb the snow covered mountain and the ones to wade through the marsh...I surrender my knapsack that I may no longer be encumber by my mind, that I may lose myself.  Fear of what will be no longer plagues my moments and thoughts of the past, well they are but thoughts.  I struggle no more, thinking, dwelling on that which I cannot control, this universe is out of my control so why pretend I am some tyrannical overlord?  I am me, I am made in your image, I share your likeness, I am loved unconditionally, I know peace, I know joy...what more could I possibly seek?  Mind clutter, it prevents me, no I prevent me, from seeing the now, from being in the now, from extracting joy from every moment.  Life is about joy, it is about peace, it is about love and extrapolating only from the mind is to experience none of the greatness for I lay in wait for a bomb to hit.  Strategically played, the bomb need never hit for the fortress, grand and mighty, can implode at any moment.  I see now the tragic repercussions of worry, of doubt and though I am wounded I know Your love can and will heal every wound, self inflicted or not.  Lose myself, that is my prayer today, Lord, lose myself.  What better way to enter the trenches of this world then armored with Your love?  My mind settled, my mind no longer a weapon for it has been silenced by love, Your love.  While trust is difficult to surmise in this world, trusting You is natural.  You know my heart, no longer need I fear for Your peace has tempered my soul.  In the silence I hear your voice, it tenderly calls my name, with tears I fall into your arms and lose myself...